Monday, May 2, 2011

STINKEN CLEAN

Ah, spring!
Time to clean…
To make things fresh…
To clean out the clutter…
Like some junk that was in my closet…
Specifically, some purses I hadn’t used in years.
Before pitching them I checked inside…
(maybe I'd find some money stashed)
I picked up one that used to be my favorite and opened it.
Hmm? What this?
(it was an 8 ½ x 11 folded paper)
Curious, I opened the folded paper and–
Oh, dear God!
Lord have mercy!
Nooooooo!
Yuck!
Yeesch!
Bleh!
How utterly, totally, and unequivocally embarrassing!
It was a query letter…
Obviously one of the first ones I’d ever written…
Why? I mean what was it doing–
Oh, yeah, I remember now…
I’d taken this purse to a writer’s conference many years ago…
Lord! To think I ever thought this was good!
Or that I ever sent this monstrosity out!
Or that an agent read it!
Or that I was capable of writing such garbage!
Oh, the shame, the shame!
I’ve since come to the conclusion…
That when it comes to age…
Some things do get better…
Like my writing skills…
And query letters.
What about you?
Ever find any old stinker query letters?

Always , Em Musing

6 comments:

Anne Gallagher said...

I've never found an old query letter, but I have found some pretty stinky writing in some old boxes I forgot I had in the basement. Ewwww.

Misha said...

Lol I've never queried, but perhaps one day I will find one and get the heebie-jeebies.

^_^

Sarah said...

I do have printed pages of the first novel I ever wrote ... it fell behind the nightstand and for some reason, I haven't yet bothered to retrieve it. I have picked up those pages from time to time (usually while looking for something else that fell behind the nightstand) and I actually feel proud--I've worked really hard and come a long way. So maybe you can think of it like that! Look how far you've come!

Jennifer Shirk said...

Old query letters, old manuscripts, old synopsis, and yeah, BLECH. What was I thinking??

Lydia K said...

The things you find in old purses! Yucky lipsticks, receipts, old query letters. You never know.

Her highness, Samantha Vérant said...

Hahaha. Nothing like a bit of the past to slap you in the face. Too funny. I've kept all my letters---they make me laugh...now.