Monday, August 6, 2012

FLUSHING FEAT

Wow
So exciting, the Olympics...
I’m really into the spirit of the games...
And since living here in Mexico
I’ve taken up certain maneuvers myself…
That require Olympic precision like…
The ‘Squat, Hover, and Balance’…
The, ‘Stand, Pivot and Toss…
The Gather, Flush, and Squeeze.’
What?
You never heard of ”El Bano Olympics…
Otherwise known as the fine art of toilet humping…
And other meticulous bathroom callisthenics?
And it’s all because the sewer systems here are small…
And throwing wet toilet paper down the loo is a no, no…
So you have to toss it in a basket…
That’s always behind you.
And then there are the size of the stalls, also small…
Obviously to accommodate the local women.
I feel like Gulliver in Lilliput.
I mean really?
Couldn’t the builder...
Have made the stalls just one inch bigger?
I know all you women KNOW what I’m talking about….
It’s about you and your clothing…
Not touching ‘anything’ in the stall...
Especially if something is left from the previous user.
Oh, you guys have it made.
You have no idea…
What acrobatics we women go through...
And that’s just when we’re solo...
Imagine a toddler in there too.
As far as I know for the most part….
The only maneuver you guys have to do is…
Zip, Whip ‘n’ Wizz.
The bano odds are definitely in your favor.

Always, Em-Musing

9 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

We have the advantage - what can I say?

Ayda Recknagel said...

Yep... 'zip, whip and wizz' is going to be stuck in my head all day.

DL Hammons said...

I'm not thinking its much of an advantage. :)

Carol Kilgore said...

So, so true. This is about the only time I think it would be cool to be a guy. Fun post!

paula contreras said...

I have been in Mexican, bathrooms, I know what you mean. Such a hillarious post, thanks for the laughs this morning.

Shay Lacy said...

You are so right. Whip & whiz.

Michelle Kott said...

Lol! Oh my! Throwing paper in the wastebasket....

Slamdunk said...

I think your post should definitely be required reading for visitors to that part of the world. Stand, Pivot, Toss and the others have good rhythm already...

Talli Roland said...

El Bano Olympics! Hahahaha! I think I've performed in those before...:)