Tuesday, October 2, 2012

SIMPLY BOMBASTIC



I’m struggling learning to speak Spanish…
Not just because of learning all the words…
And how they’re used in different scenarios…
Plus verb tenses and sentence structure…
But also the amount of words used…
Just to say something…
Or to answer a simple question.
Recently, when I was at a supplier of granite…
I wanted to know if the countertop on display…
Was made with one slab of granite or two?
Uno o dos?
However, when my builder asked the salesman…
It went something like this:
(of course I don’t know what they really were saying)
POR FAVOR.LOSIENTOELLEESMADONA.
YONOSE PORQUEELLETEINEQUESABOR
ELLEQUIERASABORACERCADELGRANITO
SIENTOMOLESTARTESEQUELAMUJERESTA
LOCASOYCONSTRUCTOR.NOPUEDOESPERER
PARAESTETRABAJOAFINHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Cripes! How many different ways…
Were there to ask a simple question?
SOELLAQUIERASABORESELCONTATOR
HECHODEUNALOSOOODOS.LOS SIENTO
ELLEESMADONA.HAHA HAHAHAHAHA.
Perhaps they were discussing the detailed history…
Of how the granite was formed a million years ago?
Or the origin of this particular slab?
ASIQUEPORFAVORMEPERDONANELLA
TODAVIAESTAPARADOAQUI.TENGOQUE
DARSURESPUESTAALGUNAPIDODISCULPAS
PORSERPESADOSPUEDEUSSTEDMEDARAN
UNARESPUESTA?UNAVASMASMELAMENTO
MOLESTARIOSIAIDELLEQUIERASABORACERCA
DELGRANITO.
They couldn’t be talking about the installation…
Because I wasn’t even near that process yet.
TENGOQUEMIRAPARAARRIBAPODRIA
SERAUNAOPODRIANSERDOSTENDREQUE
PREGUNTARLEAMIMANAGERPEROESTA
OCUPADO.QUIERASQUELOMOLESTARA?
NONOESIMPORTANTE.
Oh, come on!
All I needed to hear was uno o dos? One or two?
I mean, how many different ways to ask and answer…
Could there possibly be?
Five minutes later my builder turned to me and said,
“They’re not sure.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me, right?”
He wasn’t.
Cripes!
Everyone knows I’m the queen of lean copy…
I write and speak short.
While I believe I will learn to speak Spanish some day...
I just don't know if I'll ever learn...
The secondary language of bombast.
Is it just me?
Or have you ever noticed some languages...
Just take longer to speak?

Always, Em-Musing

6 comments:

Jessica Bell said...

How funny :-) yeah it can get a bit like that here in Greece too.

momto8blog said...

oh my gosh..that is funny!
my son spent the summer in Mexico to learn Spanish and learned it! now he has to seek ways to keep speaking it...but none of his friends want to be bothered one tiny bit.
good luck to you too!
i am your newest follower..pls follow back if you can.

Adam said...

Learning a new language ain't easy.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

It's easier to pick up as a kid. I used to speak fluent Japanese. Don't remember but a few words now.

The Desert Rocks said...

Since I live near Mexico I see it often and think it's funny. Just like your wonderfully funny post! Well. now I want to know though...one or two?

Em-Musing said...

LOL! Still don't know. Went back today and that's the answer.