Tuesday, January 22, 2013

I DECLARE WAR!


WAR!
Remember that card game?

Well, I recently played it with my cleaning lady…

But we didn’t play it with cards…

But rather with cleaning products.

Her first time over…

I went over how I like my house cleaned…

I started off with explaining the benefits of a Swiffer…

That, mind you I risked having confiscated….

A few weeks ago at Cancun’s airport customs…

It was after that, that the war began….

Me:  For wet floors, I use a sponge mop.”

She: “I’d rather use a wet mop,”

Me:  “I want you to use these micro fiber cloths.”

She: “I like to use my own rags to wipe things.”

Me:  “I want you to use water, bleach or vinegar…

She: “I like to use Fabuloso. It’s better than your 
       cleaning stuff.”

Me:  Oh, no, no, no! You must never use Fabuloso!”

She: Glared at me like I just pinched her baby

Me:  “My house is not caca or barfy dirty…

       It’s just dusty and dirt dirty…

       It doesn’t need to be disinfected.

       OK, yes, the toilet is icky…

       Then use bleach. But that’s it. ”

She:  “But I’ve always used Fabuloso.”

Me:  “I don’t like chemicals.”  

She: “You can’t be clean without Fabuloso.”

Me:  “Yes you can. And besides, it’ll ruin my floor.”

She: “But all women use Fabuloso.”

Me:  “But I’m not all women.”

She:  Glared at me.

Me:   Glared back.

She:  Glared even harder.

Me:   “Look, this is my house. If you don’t my rules…

        You can—

Whoa!


What was I doing having a stand-off?

Not too many cleaning women speak English…

I could wind up being the loser here if she quit…

And I’d probably have the same stand-off…

With every other cleaning woman.

So…

Perhaps I’ll reconsider some things…

But never, never  my stand on Fabulosa…

Because…

I—Declare—War—on—Fabuloso!

So?

Think I’ve got OCD—Obsessive-Cleaning-Dissorder?

Have you ever been obsessive about something?

What was it?

Always, Em-Musing

5 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

You're paying HER. Your house, your rules. Stand by them.

Adam said...

War, that was a good part of my childhood.

Gossip_Grl said...

OMGosh! I clean houses for a living and couldn't live w/o Swiffer... everything! :) And OMG I go no where w/o Magic Eraser! :) Only 2 houses are particular about what I clean with and they have allergies and provide me with all natural products. I always ask a client about their particulars and your right your house, your rules. OMG Fabuloso! No way.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

You'll have to confiscate the Fabulosa when she enters the house. And get that woman hooked on Swiffers! They are wonderful.

Crystal Collier said...

*shaking head* Paying customers are always right. Still, when you've got someone set in their ways...