Friday, February 1, 2013

DON''T MIND MY GAMES


My mind likes to play tricks on me…
Like seeing words that aren’t there.
For instance, yesterday…
I was researching ‘capitalizations’ on Google…
And this web-site came up:
‘Capitalization after colons’
But what my mind saw was:
Capitalizing after colonoscopies.
Say what?
Is that like now that your colon is clean...
it's a good time to have booty sex?
Knowing my mind plays these tricks…
I stared at the phrase…
Until the real phrase became clear. Duh. 
My mind does this all the time.
Here’s another instance…
Down the street from my house...
Is an Orgasmic Yoga center. Not.
What the sign really says is, Organic Yoga.
But I always see Orgasmic Yoga. Cool concept though. 
And to think…
I used to do voiceovers for a living…
Thankfully, I usually got the script ahead of time…
But sometimes when I didn’t…
I’d be interrupted by the engineer in the booth…
Who’d say, “That sounded great, Leigh…
But I have no idea what you just said.”
Also…
When I’m talking…
I’ll often think of two or more similar words…
Like dove and jump…
And I guess my mind can’t pick which word to use…
So I’ll wind up saying something like...
I dumped in the pool.”
Realizing that sounded stupid I’d then say...
“Sorry, I meant to say, I jove in the pool.”
People look at me like, whaa?
I also talk in half-speech…
Like not finishing a sentence…
Expecting the listener to finish it in their head.
Again, people look at me and go, huh?
But then…
My sisters and cousins all do it too…
Maybe it's a rogue speech gene?
So?
Anyone else with a practical joke kind of mind?
Do you know what this trickster affliction is?
Have a great weekend.

Always, Em-Musing

6 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

That gave me a good chuckle this morning. I'll occasionally see a different word. Judging from the words you are seeing, one might think you had sex on the brain...

Jennifer Shirk said...

LOL! "I dumped in the pool"

I don't normally say things but I DO see things funny too and I have to take a second (sometimes third) look. :)

Anne Gallagher said...

I originally had THE EARL'S ENIGMA as the title for my latest book, THE EARL'S ENGAGEMENT.

I kept seeing THE EARL'S ENIMA. Needless to say, I changed the title.

Carol Kilgore said...

I'm bad about not finishing sentences. My sister doesn't finish hers either. Husband is used to it by now.

The Desert Rocks said...

You are one of those wise women whose mind works quicker than her tongue.

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