Tuesday, December 13, 2016


Recently I had hip replacement surgery
Oh the pain, the ache! 
But not in my hip 
Rewind ten years ago
When I lived in the States
And was full-time babysitter for my 3 grandkids
To entertain them and myself
I would bring over various CD's
Then grab each one and whirl and twirl them ‘round and ‘round.
One of their favorites was Tchaikovsky's, The Nutcracker Suite
Especially Waltz of the Flowers.
My oldest granddaughter eventually took ballet lessons
And I always wondered 
If all the whirling and twirling had an influence.
Throughout the years
I went to many of her performances 
And was proud, to say the least. She was good.
And then a few months ago I got a call

Grandma! I made it into The Nutcracker! 
Three parts! A flower, a snowflake, and an Arabian!
Oh my god, Sweetie, So happy for you. When?
November 18th, 19th & the 20th. You’re coming, right?

My heart sank to the lowest it’s ever been
That was the weekend of my surgery
Oh why couldn’t the performance be in December?
If you’ve ever had surgery
You know it’s not like showing up for an oil change
When they can take you right in
And in my case if I cancelled my surgery
I’d have to wait months for another slot.

I’m sorry, Sweetie, I can’t come.
** silence **

Eventually she understood
My head did too
But not my heart. Still ached.
My daughter called after the first performance

She did exceptionally well.
Did you take a video? I asked.
They didn’t allow it.

The night before the last performance
I called my granddaughter 

Sweetie, please can you take a picture
Of you in your costumes
So I can at least see how you look? Please!

And she did.

My heart eased some
And I made a vow to her
That next year
Come hell or high water
Or surgery
I’d be there to see her perform.

Ever have any heart-aching circumstances?
Or have a "thing" yay or nay for The Nutcracker?



1 comment:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

She looks beautiful. Sorry you couldn't be there. Just bad timing. Although crappy they wouldn't allow video.