Thursday, March 31, 2011

THE DIRTY AND DOWN

While thoroughly enjoying
Cleaning my oven door yesterday morning.
I came to realize that certain words
Should never be paired together.
You may think, why? No big deal. They’re only words.
Well, before I share what those words are…
I’ll share with you some of my past cleaning behavior:
I’ve been known to multi-task while on the pot…
Wanted to write a book...
On the many uses of used Bounty paper towels…
Anxiously waited for things to get dirty so I could clean them again…
Well, the list is endless—and so is dirt—yeah!
Anyway, while scraping the grease-caked oven slats with a knife…
I realized that cleaning people don’t really clean deep down
Like I do…
And that’s why I never hired a cleaning person…
(OK, I did once, but as you guessed, she didn’t clean to my expectations)
And that’s why the term “anal retentive” applies to me.
So…
Playing around with the idea that I’d make a perfect cleaning lady…
(not that I’m going to pursue that)
I thought of the perfect slogan for my new company: Anal Cleaning
EEEUUWW! NOT!
But see? Those two words should never be put together.
I’m happy to share that I’m not a clean freak anymore.
Now that I’ve been living on my own, that deep down urge has gone away.
Sure, I still clean…
(And the oven cleaning only came about because the sun shone brightly)
But now I pursue things that truly satisfy me deep down
And that is—writing.
Anything satisfy you deep down?

Always, Em-Musing

2 comments:

Anne Gallagher said...

hahhahahhahhahahahahhahahahah.

And only because the sun shone brightly.

I see we clean the same way. It's been raining here for a week. I bet you know what my house looks like. It's supposed to be nice tomorrow. Guess what I'll be doing.

Justine Dell said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

I would pay to see on the side of a van! HAHAHA!!! #epicnamefail

HAHAHA!!

Sorry, can't stop laughing!!

~JD