If you’ve ever traveled to another country…
You know you have to fill out a customs form…
To answer questions like…
Are you carrying pathogens, samples…
Goo gobs of money, etc,etc.
Of course I always answer, no.
Just a few days ago:
Scenario: Customs at Cancun airport.
Characters: Me and a Mexican customs agent a.k.a MCA
MCA: Are you a salesperson?
Me: Am I a salesperson? No! (laughs, unwisely)
MCA: Then why do you have a dozen of these boxes?
Me: (getting excited) They’re my Swiffers! I just moved into
my new home. I need these to clean. And if my
house isn’t clean, I can’t concentrate and write.
You see, I’m a writer.
MCA: Why don’t you buy them here in Mexico?
Me: I can’t get Swiffers in Mexico. I tried everywhere.
MCA: Why don’t you just use a broom or mop like
Me: (getting more excited) Because nothing cleans a
floor better than Swiffers.
MCA: (looking at me like I’m a nut) And these bottle and cans?
Me: Oh, that’s Old English and my stainless steel
MCA: Are you sure you’re not a salesperson?
Me: No, really! I’m Swedish.
MCA: What does that have to do with it?
Me: Next to sex, we Swedes love to clean.
MCA: (clearly NOT amused)
Me: (getting teary eyed realizing that was a stupid thing to say)
You’re not going to take away my Swiffers are you?
MCA: Glares at my stash of cleaning products then
waves me on.
Me: Muchas gracias! Muchas, muchas gracias!
Phew! That was a close call. And really, please don’t think I have OCD…
It’s just that a girl has to clean how a girl likes to clean so she can write. Right?
And what about you?
How right does your world have to be to write?
If you moved to another country…
What product couldn’t you function without?