Friday, July 9, 2010


While babysitting my 3 grandkids plus 1 other…
I became the victim of my own bad plot.
And all because I tripped on Kit Kitteridge…
My granddaughter’s American Girl doll.
WHY can’t they pick up after themselves?
That’s it! I had had enough!
“Hey guys!” I yelled out. “Come here.”
They gathered around, not sure why I called them.
Now maybe because I had just seen a Travelocity TV spot…
But more likely because I read Chuck Sambuchino’s Writer's Digest blog on Wednesday…
About his book How To Survive a Garden Gnome Attack…
That I came up with this half-baked story.
“You kids need to learn not to leave your toys everywhere. And you want to know why?”
Their blank faces told me they didn’t and that they really didn’t care.
“Well, if you leave your toys out anymore…
They’ll disappear!”
“Evil gnomes will steal them.”
“Where do they take our toys?” they asked.
“They take them to children who’ll appreciate them. Understand?”
They nodded and gave me that, yeah whatever glare then took off.
And who could blame them? Such a weak scenario.
Fast forward a few hours…
 And I have to load the kids up in the van to go somewhere.
“Come on you guys we gotta go! Are you ready?”
“Yeah, we’re ready they chimed, barreling down the stairs.
And I was too except…
“Have you guys seen my flip flops?”
They shook their heads.
“Are you sure?”
They nodded.
“I left them in the hall.”
They shrugged their shoulders.
I circled the house once more.
Even checked the bathrooms.
But my flip flops were nowhere to be seen.
“This is ridiculous! Are you kids sure you didn't see my flip flops?”
They shook their heads.
Hmm? Were those smirks on their dirty little faces?
“Maybe the gnomes took them?” my oldest granddaughter said.
“Yeah, the gnomes!" the other three chirped in.
And there they were…
Four kids staring at me, grinning.
Now what?
Admit that there are no such things as evil gnomes who steal stuff? They’d never believe me again.
Play along with their game? But that would take time, I had to get going!
Admit to myself I’m getting old and forgetful and couldn’t remember where I put them? NEVER!
So I circled the house one more time.
Finally I spotted my flip flops under my briefcase.
Hmm? I didn't remember putting them there.
After putting them on 
I smiled at the kids
They smiled back
Oh, no!
Who would cave first?
Well, there was only one thing a grandma could do…
“Who wants to go get some ice cream?”
“We do!’
Yeah, I know
Unfair advantage.
But it was the only way we could all save face.

Always, Em-Musing

1 comment:

Jill Kemerer said...

Ha! Too cute. Those kids can outsmart me every time. Ice cream to the rescue!