AYE DUE

Reality TV can be a real nail-biter.

Especially when my life is part of the evening's show!

Yesterday was reality TV at its best.

Our nation’s congress was in session.

Live!

On a Sunday!

Voting on health care bills.

I watched the quips and snips…

The logic and reason…

From commentators.

On both sides of the aisle.

And the vote got down to the wire!

Phew!

And now my life could change.

For better…

Or worse…

Through sickness…

And health.

But …

Not till the death part.

Because if the bill isn't what they promised…

I’m going to go into the voting booth this November…

Find the representative that took a vow to honor me...

And divorce him!

Aye vote on that!

 Always, Em-Musing

TRYING NOT TO BE IRE-ISH

WOO HOO HA HA, WOO HOO HA HA, WOO HOO HA HA HA!

You may be wondering…

BOO HOO HA HA, BOO HOO HA HA, BOO HOO HA HA HA!

Just what the heck I’m doing...

LOO HOO HA HA, LOO HOO HA HA, LOO HOO HA HA HA!

Well, I didn’t want to have to resort to this...

NOO HOO HA HA, NOO HOO HA HA, NOO HOO HA HA HA!

But after the last straw happened this afternoon…

ROO HOO HA HA, ROO HOO HA HA, ROO HOO HA HA HA!

I’m chanting away the bad vibes...

CHOO HOO HA HA, CHOO HOO HA HA, CHOO HOO HA HA HA!

And then...

NOO HOO HA HA, NOO HOO HA HA, NOO HOO HA HA HA!

I'm going to send myself good ones.

Why?

Because last Thursday after the bank lost my driver’s license…

Friday, after my morning flight was cancelled...

Yesterday waiting 5 hours in RSW airport and getting an email query rejection…

Last night having my luggage lost in Detroit…

And just today locking my keys in my car…

I figured positive thinking isn't working for me lately.

So here goes-

Hey wait a minute!

It’s St. Patrick’s day!

Maybe I can attract some "luck of the Irish!"

But then, I’m not Irish.

But then, everyone’s Irish on St. Patty’s day.

That's it!

I’ll find an Irish blessing.

(Or Irish beer)

And see what happens.

Here's a good blessing.

May the best day of your past
Be the worst day of your future.

Always, Em-Musing

P.S. Maybe it's working already. My luggage was delivered today, nothing missing :)

JUST AW-FULL

You would think sitting on my arse for five hours…

Stuck in an airport would be…

Irritating!

Frustrating!

Awful!

But it was OK.

Actually it was more than OK.

I had my laptop with me!

And praise the powers that be there was free WiFi!

Woo Hooo!

So, with laptop on lap…

And an available plug by the large window with the sun streaming in I–

Eeuuww!

Noticed cat hair on my keyboard!

Eeuuww!

And so I cleaned my keyboard.

And then the screen.

And then (with a Starbucks iced coffee nearby I...

Skyped a friend and talked for awhile.

Checked Facebook and caught up with my friends and family.

Read current and past blogs from agents and fellow writers who I follow.

Cleaned the junk mail from my email.

Responded to emails that I needed to.

Sent an email news release of an upcoming MVRWA book lovers event.

Read all the entertaining emails that I had saved for months because I never had the time to read them.

Got a–

Aw!

Rejection email from an agent I had queried a couple of weeks ago.

Right there while I was sitting in the airport.

Aw!

And a form rejection no less.

Aw!

Oh well.

At least this agent read my query and responded back.

And I know my query isn’t floating somewhere in the vast unknown of the Internet, lost, forgotten, or overlooked.

So, after a few days of heaven down in sunny FLA…

I’m back in Toledo today.

Back to sending out more query letters.

And back to probably more rejec–

NO!

I’m going to think positive.

Because the sun is shining here in Toledo this morning...

My laptop is clean (literally)...

And there will be an agent who responds to my query and...

Thinks my manuscript is AWESOME!

Always, Em-Musing

IMPS HAVE LEFT THE BUILDING

Yesterday the imps followed me.

Thankfully, I made it to coffee with my writer friends.

And while I was with them, they put some good mojo on two query letters that I had in my purse.

What followed was nothing short of crazy.

No, nothing with the query letters.

I mailed them just fine.

But the rest of the day...

That's when the crazies (or imps) hit.

First…

The bank lost my driver’s license…

While I was standing there!

Just vanished into thin air.

Or into someone else’s transaction.

Like in the plastic tube/capsule that shoots over to someone’s car...

I'm thinking it was because the teller was multi-tasking with my transaction and two others.

Thankfully, I had time (barely) to get another one.

I’m traveling by plane today and absolutely have to have it.

And just when I thought the crazies were over…

I came home last night wanting to email yesterday’s blog to my friends and contacts when–

ERROR

All my AOL contacts were GONE!

Couldn’t find them.

I did everything I could think of to get them back.

But they were gone.

Frustrated, angry, thinking I was losing my mind…

I just shut the computer down...

Drank a Dox Equis beer ...

And went to bed.

(obviously not worrying about the calories)

Thankfully, this morning ...

My contacts are back.

The imps are gone.

I’m packing up the laptop…

And heading to Florida for a long weekend!

Hope there are no imps down there.

Always, Em-Musing

IMP POSSIBLE

I wonder if the electronic world …

Has “off” days?

Or “bad” days?

Or, “I’ll sabotage everything the writer is working on, ha, ha, ha!” days?

Yesterday was one of those days.

Everything I formatted …

Wouldn’t stay formatted!

Especially for this blog.

My fonts wouldn’t stay fonted!

My spacing would stay spaced.

Every time I previewed my blog…

It looked great!

Then …

I would hit “publish” and check it out and–

Arrrgghh!

It looked crazy!

Then I tried to print an envelope to send out a query…

Using the same printer…

The same format…

And the same type of envelope as I always do.

But yesterday, my printer decided to print anywhere it wanted to on the envelope!

My return address was way off the top.

The delivery address was way at the bottom.

Arrrgghh!

I wasted half a box of pricey envelopes.

Finally, I got one I could use.

I checked the spelling and address of the agent…

I folded the letter…

I…

GOT BUTTER ON THE ENVELOPE!

ARRRGGHH!

For heaven’s sake!

Why did the fork sitting on the plate on my desk…

Just jump off the plate and onto my one clean perfect envelope?

Yes, I probably shouldn’t have had my plate sitting on my desk.

And Julia...
Though most things go better with butter...
I don't believe query letters do.

But I do believe that besides the electronic world having "off" days…

There are also electronic imps.
Or maybe even butter imps.

Or “I’ll sabotage everything the writer is working on, ha, ha, ha!” imps.

So this morning as I'm writing this blog…

I'd better go before the "spill coffee on the laptop" imp…

Or the "delete everything on the writer's hard drive" imp…

Or the "I'll sabotage whatever it takes so the writer can't meet her writer friends for coffee ha, ha, ha!" imp …
Shows up.
See ya!

Always, Em-Musing

I LIKE TO DOT

OMG!

I just saw Janet Reid’s comment about ellipses on her 2/14//10 blog, Query Shark.

They drive her bonkers because most people misuse them.
I know, I know, I know …
I use A LOT of them too.
But in defense of my use of ellipses…
I use them mostly in my blog.
Not my manuscripts.
So if a would-be agent happens to check out my blog …
Please don’t think that I am an abuser/misuser of punctuation.
Because there’s a method to my writing my blog “this way.”
“This way” being clipped sentences, phrases, ellipses, and endashes.
Maybe I’m wrong ...

But I don’t want a thought/sentence to run-on and into the next line too often.

Why?
Because my mind (and I’m thinking the reader’s mind too), wanders.

Even after one sentence.
For heaven’s sake!
If my own mind wanders, and I’m the writer…
I can only imagine that the reader will be long gone if I don’t keep it short.

So here’s my philosophy…

I think of bloggers like food grazers.

So many blogs to read on the Internet/ so much food on the buffet table.
Only so much time to read/ only so much room in the stomach.
Therefore …
If it's easy to read/bite size…
Then the reader/eater…
Won’t get too full and …
Hopefully will come back often to read/graze.

FYI,   here's the definition of ellipsis from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: 

The most common form of an ellipsis is a row of three periods or full stops (...) or pre-composed triple-dot glyph (…). The usage of the em dash (—) can overlap the usage of ellipsis.Ellipsis (plural ellipses; from the Greek: ἔλλειψις, élleipsis, "omission") is a mark or series of marks that usually indicate an intentional omission of a word or a phrase from the original text. An ellipsis can also be used to indicate a pause in speech, an unfinished thought, or, at the end of a sentence, a trailing off into silence (aposiopesis) (apostrophe and elipsis mixed). The ellipsis calls for a slight pause in speech.  The triple-dot punctuation mark is also called a suspension point, points of ellipsis, periods of ellipsis, or colloquially, dot-dot-dot. 

And if you ever saw the movie, Mamma Mia ...
Then you know just how much fun dot-dot-dotting is.   


Always, Em-Musing

SIN OF OMISSION

I wasn't going to blog about the Oscars today …

It’s just so “yesterday.”
But a few things astounded me.

The first was that Farrah Fawcett was not mentioned in the memoriam tribute montage.

Here’s the weak explanation Bruce Davis, the executive director of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, gave, "It is the single most troubling element of the Oscar show every year. Because more people die each year than can possibly be included in that segment. You are dropping people who the public knows. It's just not comfortable."

Really?

He thought that boring dance sequence near the end of the program was more important?

And specifically this part of his quote bothers me, “who the public knows?”

Sorry Mr. Davis, I didn’t know (and I’m sure most of the view audience didn’t either)…

Many of the people you included in that montage.

But you thought it was OK to dismiss someone as important as Farrah? Or Bea Arthur? Or Ricardo Montelban? Or Henry Gibson?

Just put your big boy panties on, suck it up, put your ego on the shelf and apologize.

I mean, Jane Fonda even tweeted about it, "And where was Farrah Fawcett? She should have been included," Jane tweeted. 
And that was the other thing that astounded me …

Jane Fonda tweets!

Recently, during coffee with some of my fellow writers …

And more specifically my fellow writers from MVRWA…

We were pondering the merits of tweeting.

Do we have time to learn yada yada yada.

Well, I think it’s time I learn to tweet.

I mean, if Jane learned to tweet…

I need to put my big girl panties, suck it up and ...

Learn to tweet too.

Always, Em-Musing

DISCLAIMER: There are some members of MVRWA do in fact tweet. I wouldn't want to sin by omission.

AND THE OSCAR GOES TO?

Me!

I stayed up and watched the Oscars till it was over.

Way past my bedtime.

Was it worth it?

Well…

I really wanted Meryl Streep to win.

Oh Boo hoo!

I thought the gowns this year were all gorgeous.

However, they didn’t make up for lackluster duo of Martin and Baldwin.

Can we have Billy Crystal again? Please?

And even though you know the accepters were told to “keep it short”…

The whole event was long. Very long.

Did the event need that last dance performance?

I couldn’t find the relevance of including it. Especially so late in the evening.

But a couple of things made the Oscars relevant to me.

First, my niece…

She is a make-up artist in Hollywood.

And she was there!

Yeah niecey!

And second, I imagined me getting an Oscar.

Don’t laugh. It could happen.

I’m working on a screenplay that I, and the producers hope to submit in the short film category one day.

Soon! Please! Before more wrinkles hit me!

Currently, I’m still working on the edits, but that’s OK. I’m inspired now.

Especially after hearing the voiceover talent read from actual screenplays.

If you have ever written a screenplay, then you know how very different it is than writing novels.

And while I can imagine seeing my published book in bookstores one day …

It’s not same as winning an Oscar and…

Wearing a gorgeous gown!

Hmm?

I wonder “who” I will wear?

And I wonder, would it ever be appropriate to wear my gorgeous gown to a book signing?

Have to get some use out of it, no?

Always, Em-Musing

CAN'T TOUCH THIS!

 I love the color yellow.

Just not when it’s coming out of my grandson’s nose.

And I love the color pink.

Just not when it’s describing his left eye.

“Mom! The baby’s sick! Can you come over and watch him today?”

Whoosh!

There went my plans for meeting with my writer group friends for coffee.

(Not to mention sending out more query letters to agents)

Oh well, guess that’s what stay-at-home grandma/writers are for.

And I really don’t mind but …

I have fear!

Other than that never-ending cold I got on the plane from LA back in November …

I’ve managed to avoid, prevent, and steer clear of …

Getting sick.

But my grandson is 17 months old.

And his sticky, snotty little infectious hands touch everything!

Including my mouth!

Oh, well, I guess that’s what hand sanitizer is for.

And he always manages to cough …

Right in my face!

(does hand sanitizer work on faces?)

But the good news is …

I brought my laptop over to my daughter’s house and I can--
WARNING!

Snotty toddler approaching!

Forget the sanitizer!

Save the laptop!

Always, Em-Musing

NO DADDY LONG LEGS

I just had to share this.

And I don’t mean to make light of or be offensive to anyone who has a nervous disorder.

But in doing research (don’t ask) I came upon this below.

Thesaurus Legend:  Synonyms Related Words Antonyms

		TARANTISM - a nervous disorder characterized by an uncontrollable impulse to dance; popularly attributed to bite of the southern European tarantula or wolf spider

Note: wolf spider!

Hmm?

I DO love to dance, and will at any given moment if the music is right (or wrong).

I AM afraid of wolf spiders as my family, friends and readers of my blog know.

(And wolf spiders HAVE frequented my apartment)

So?

Love dancing?

Bitten by wolf spider? (a likely chance)

Coincidence?

I think not.

Always, Em-Musing