HOW TO MAKE A WRITER CRAZY

This morning…

With fingers poised over my keyboard…

And an idea in my head…

For my blog post today…

I turn on my computer…

Hmm?

Why is my desktop picture changed?

I go to click on my blog icon on my desktop…

Huh?

Where is it?

And…

Where are ALL my icons?

 ** breathing faster **

I go to click on WORD…

My recently re-download WORD…

Because my other computer crashed.

WHERE IS WORD???

** breathing accelerates **

I click to check my email files…

All my email files – GONE!

** hyperventilating **

I go to find my recovered files from Carbonite…

GONE! 

** tears * wailing * sobbing **

Then…

An inner voice calmly says…

Take a deep breath…

Remember yesterday?

Your nephew used your computer?

BASTARD!

Did he sign in under guest?

I have no idea.

Shut down your computer, then start it up.

15 seconds go by… 

The longest seconds of my life.

Computer boots up…

Apple tune plays…

Two graphics pop up…

USER    GUEST

With shaky finger, I click on USER and…

GLORY HALLELUIAH!!

Desktop, Icons, deck, files - All there!

** breathing returning to normal **

Phew!

My computer was intact…

And my sanity…

Because for a few brief moments…

I felt like I was slipping over the edge.

But you didn't. You can relax now.…

It's too early for wine… 

But chocolate will work. 

Go ahead. Indulge. You earned it.

So?

How’s your morning going?

Ever experience anything like this? 

Always,

Em-Musing

SEE ME, FEEL ME, TOUCH ME

Mmm! You smell divine!

I love having you in bed at night…

With a glass of wine…

Exploring your mysteries within.

I love waking up with you and a cup of coffee.

And…

Anticipating a few stolen moments…

On a busy afternoon.

Or a quickie in a park.

And when you’re really, really good…

I like sharing you with my friends!

BOOKS, people! BOOKS!

I’m talking about reading a real book…

Versus reading e-books.

Yeah, yeah, I know…

e-books are convenient…

And I have tried, really I have…

But my eyes need a rest from digital images.

But more…

Reading an e-book versus a real book…

To me is like getting…

Digital images of flowers …

Versus getting real live flowers…

That you can touch, feel, and smell.

I also find enjoyment…

looking at the books on my shelf...
With their colors, fonts, images, and graphics.
Unfortunately…
Most of the e-books I've downloaded…
Have been forgotten somewhere in cyberspace. 
How about you?

What’s your preference?

And why?

Always,

E-Musing

A WORD IS WORTH A THOUSAND PICS

OK…

I’m going to fess up…

I filled out a form on Match.com…

A year ago!

But quit because of…um…er…well…

I’ll write about that in another post.

But even though I quit my subscription…

I still get teasing emails like this one that reads…

HE emailed you. Find out what HE said.

** thinking…thinking…thinking **

Yup, I dared to open the email from—HE

(FYI there were no photos, just his words)

Hi my name is Ronnie you sure nice looking woman

What?

Huh?

Interpretation please!

No, not the sentiment…

I get that he thinks I’m a nice looking woman…

And yes, sometimes we all misspell…

But surely…  

There are missing words, no?

Like, “you sure are a nice looking woman.”

Or IS this the way he talks for real?

His vernacular?

And if it is…

** thinking…thinking…thinking **

An image is forming in my brain…

That he’s a backwoodsman with no teeth…

Scraggly hair…

And a couple of hound dogs by his side.

But then it occurred to me…

It was because of his vernacular…

That I got that image in my head…

So I’m wondering…

How important do you think vernacular is in a story?

Have you ever used a character’s vernacular…

In any of your novels?

Care to give an example?

Always,

Em-Musing

WON WORLD

I was talking to a friend yesterday…

ME: Don’t you ever wonder when you’re on a plane…

     If say, for whatever reason…

     You had to fly it…

     That you could get up in that cockpit…    

     And fly it?  

      Of course, you’d have contact with the tower…

     They’d talk you through it…

     And then when you landed safely…

     The news media would be there…

     And the whole world would be amazed!

SHE: Gee, I’ve never wondered anything like that.

ME: Or what if you and I were out having drinks 

     and a thug tried to kidnap us. What would you do?

SHE: Yell for help? Why? What would you do?

ME: I’d break a wine bottle over his head, punch    

     him in his gut, and then kick him in the nuts!

SHE: Looked at me as if I just walked off a space   

     ship.

And that’s when it dawned on me…

She and I live in very different “Head Worlds.”

In mine…

I’m always the heroine!

The rescuer!

The only one to save the world…

Obviously having powers I don’t have now.

So?

What about you?

Do you live in different “Head Worlds”…

Then other people?

(please convince me that it’s the writer in me

who comes up with these outrageous scenarios 

and I’m not coo coo. )

Always,

Em-Musing