AND THE OSCAR GOES TO?

Me!

I stayed up and watched the Oscars till it was over.

Way past my bedtime.

Was it worth it?

Well…

I really wanted Meryl Streep to win.

Oh Boo hoo!

I thought the gowns this year were all gorgeous.

However, they didn’t make up for lackluster duo of Martin and Baldwin.

Can we have Billy Crystal again? Please?

And even though you know the accepters were told to “keep it short”…

The whole event was long. Very long.

Did the event need that last dance performance?

I couldn’t find the relevance of including it. Especially so late in the evening.

But a couple of things made the Oscars relevant to me.

First, my niece…

She is a make-up artist in Hollywood.

And she was there!

Yeah niecey!

And second, I imagined me getting an Oscar.

Don’t laugh. It could happen.

I’m working on a screenplay that I, and the producers hope to submit in the short film category one day.

Soon! Please! Before more wrinkles hit me!

Currently, I’m still working on the edits, but that’s OK. I’m inspired now.

Especially after hearing the voiceover talent read from actual screenplays.

If you have ever written a screenplay, then you know how very different it is than writing novels.

And while I can imagine seeing my published book in bookstores one day …

It’s not same as winning an Oscar and…

Wearing a gorgeous gown!

Hmm?

I wonder “who” I will wear?

And I wonder, would it ever be appropriate to wear my gorgeous gown to a book signing?

Have to get some use out of it, no?

Always, Em-Musing

CAN'T TOUCH THIS!

 I love the color yellow.

Just not when it’s coming out of my grandson’s nose.

And I love the color pink.

Just not when it’s describing his left eye.

“Mom! The baby’s sick! Can you come over and watch him today?”

Whoosh!

There went my plans for meeting with my writer group friends for coffee.

(Not to mention sending out more query letters to agents)

Oh well, guess that’s what stay-at-home grandma/writers are for.

And I really don’t mind but …

I have fear!

Other than that never-ending cold I got on the plane from LA back in November …

I’ve managed to avoid, prevent, and steer clear of …

Getting sick.

But my grandson is 17 months old.

And his sticky, snotty little infectious hands touch everything!

Including my mouth!

Oh, well, I guess that’s what hand sanitizer is for.

And he always manages to cough …

Right in my face!

(does hand sanitizer work on faces?)

But the good news is …

I brought my laptop over to my daughter’s house and I can--
WARNING!

Snotty toddler approaching!

Forget the sanitizer!

Save the laptop!

Always, Em-Musing

NO DADDY LONG LEGS

I just had to share this.

And I don’t mean to make light of or be offensive to anyone who has a nervous disorder.

But in doing research (don’t ask) I came upon this below.

Thesaurus Legend:  Synonyms Related Words Antonyms

		TARANTISM - a nervous disorder characterized by an uncontrollable impulse to dance; popularly attributed to bite of the southern European tarantula or wolf spider

Note: wolf spider!

Hmm?

I DO love to dance, and will at any given moment if the music is right (or wrong).

I AM afraid of wolf spiders as my family, friends and readers of my blog know.

(And wolf spiders HAVE frequented my apartment)

So?

Love dancing?

Bitten by wolf spider? (a likely chance)

Coincidence?

I think not.

Always, Em-Musing

GO FOR IT!

I’ve managed to miss or sleep through most of the coverage of my favorite Olympic sport—figure skating.

But every time I turn on the TV…

There’s curling.

Does it ever end?

How many curling teams are there anyway?

How many countries compete?

It seems to me that other sports have just a few days of competition and then they’re over.

But curling is still going on.

And I don’t know, I’m sure it’s just me…

But after watching all the triple loops, lutzes, salchows, and flips …

All the alpine, moguls, cross-country and super G’s …

The hockey, speed skating, bobsledding and luge …

Shaun White doing his double McTwist on the half-pipe…

I find curling a bit…well…

Just a tad…

Boring!

There …

I said it…

Maybe someone needs to say it.

(No offense to the athletes (?) involved.

And on another sport and headline: FEAR PROMPTS BOBSLEDDER TO QUIT

OMG!

I won’t—can’t—criticize because I know fear …

And mine has never involved risking my life …

But as everyone has noted, for this man to come all the way to the Olympics just to drop out …

Well, It’s motivated me.

My fear (of success, if that’s what I have) …

Is not the same as putting my life on the line.

But now that I have a killer query letter (or so my writing colleges have told me) …

It’s time to make the move…

Take a chance…

Put all my training and skill to the test…

Go for the gold and . . .

Submit!

Always, Em-Musing

P.S. I'll keep you updated.

OH, BOO HOO

I’m watching the Winter Olympics.

Isn’t everyone?

Well, I guess not.

Even I don’t’ sit there glued.

At best I catch highlights.

And if I’m lucky (and don’t fall asleep)…

I’ll actually see some figure skating.

Recently, I read an interesting article on the Internet about some of the athletes. 

“On Saturday night during the finals of the ladies' moguls, as American Shannon Bahrke pistoned her legs down the trail, the announcer noted blithely that she has had six knee surgeries. Six. Is that all? On Sunday night J.R. Celski re-told the tale, which NBC had noted a night earlier, of how he filleted his left thigh at September's team trials and needed 60 stitches to close it. And how close he came to severing his femoral artery, in which case "I would have bled out (i.e., died) in 10 seconds. Also on Sunday night, Sandra Bezic figure-skating analyst, remarked as an aside that Canadian Jessica Dube had needed 83 stitches to close a laceration in her cheek from partner Bryce Davison's skate."

Amazing!

These daring athletes pushed themselves to the limit despite horrendous injuries to their body.

And after overcoming their injuries, went on to win Olympic medals!

So?

How can I possible moan and whimper like a baby…

When I get a rejection letter from a literary agent?

While my ego takes a hit . . .

At least there's no blood involved.

Always, Em-Musing

IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD

Searching for my retreat of dreams in Cancun...

Was a nightmare!

Oh, not that the aqua water wasn’t a feast for my eyes …

Or the tropical breezes didn’t soothe my senses …

Or that the all-inclusive package that had mountains of delicious food didn’t satisfy…

Or that I hadn’t found some real estate to look into.

It was the voice in my head that wouldn’t allow me peace.

“What are you doing?”

“What do you mean? I countered, as if I didn’t know what I was being asked.

“You’re here in Cancun on some wild goose chase squandering your time while you should be home submitting to agents.”

“But–”

“What excuses do you have, huh? Your query? It’s finished!”

“But–”

 “What’s that? You say you need a synopsis and that you’re working on it? Hello! FYI many agents don’t require one when you send the query.”

“But–”

 “And you’ve already marked the agents in the 2010 GUIDE TO LITERARY AGENTS  who accept woman’s fiction.”

“But–”

 “What? You’re insecure? You’re afraid of success? You’re a wuss!!

But I blog!”

“Blog? You’ve read dozens of times that you shouldn’t sacrifice your writing time to blog.”

“But–”

“But what?”

“I enjoy writing it. I get feedback I–”

“You’ve got to go the distance, Em. You’ve got to push. You’ll make it. Your writing is good. Your story is funny. Women will relate. There will be an agent (or several) who loves your manuscript who’ll find a publisher just as excited. You must push hard. It’s a numbers game You know that. Any questions?”

“I guess not.”

“And? What else?”

“I’ll get right to work as soon as I get home. And I’ll only blog when I’ve finished my goals for the day. OK?”

“Now you’re talking! That’s the kind of motivation I like to hear”

Always, 

Em-Musing

FIELD THE REAL

Checking out the retreat of dreams :)

Have a great weekend. :)

Blog ya next week. :)

Always, Em-Musing

LOVE CRAFT

I was talking on the phone last night with my oldest daughter . . .

Specifically about The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown.

We’re both reading it and enjoying it.

Especially all the research and facts he includes.

It’s almost as if he researched symbolism then wove a story around it.

Hey, nothing wrong if that’s what he did.

My first completed manuscript began with a simple plot . . .

But the more research I did, the more the storyline took unexpected twists and turns.

And truthfully?

I love researching almost as much as writing.

Anyway, my first manuscript, Where Demons Dwell (working title), is a supernatural thriller.

Well, I’m 99.9% sure, that is.

One of the problems I had when I started submitting it was . . .

Figuring out what the genre was.

I’m going to admit now just how ignorant I used to be with the whole writing process.

It was back in 1998 at my first writer conference, The Columbus Writers Conference, when I learned that there’s a difference between literary fiction and commercial fiction. And that there are “genres.” And that I had to figure out what the genre was for my manuscript.

So home I went to research—genres.

At first I thought the genre was religious horror, then dark religious horror, then spiritual thriller, then dark fantasy . . .

And finally I settled on supernatural thriller.  

Before I came to that conclusion however, I Googled to find what author wrote similar stories as mine.

And that’s when I learned of H.P. Lovecraft.

OMG!

Why hadn’t I heard of him before?

As a kid, I loved Mary Shelley’s, Frankenstein

(My mother actually had a first edition copy)

Before I could even read, I used to love to look at the scary illustrations.

Then Edgar Allan Poe became my favorite scary author.

My parents had many books of his short stories and poems.

And trust me . . .

You don’t want to mention "The Raven" around me . . .

When I’ve had a few shots because . . .

I will recite the whole poem.

But anyway . . .

My parents neither had H.P. Lovecraft’s books nor ever mentioned his name.

And I never learned of Lovecraft in high school.

I now own several books of Lovecraft, but cannot read them living by myself.

Way too creepy.

Somewhere along my writing journey . . .

I switched gears from scary supernatural thrillers . . . 

To writing women’s fiction, or more specifically women’s lit.

And I love that I've switched from dark and scary . . .

To light-hearted, humorous stories.

And I’m most happy because  . . .

Having already done the research . . .

I already know what genre it is.

Always , Em-Musing

P.S. I'm still serious about that writer retreat in Cancun

IF I BUILD IT?

Would you come?

To a writers retreat. . .

In Cancun?

Waiting for the impending snowstorm here in the Midwest . . .

Which is a baby storm compared to the one that slammed the East  . . .

I’m restless . . .

I’m one of those people who like warm (and hot) tropical breezes . . .

Not cold arctic blasts.

Yes, I can create an atmosphere in my head . . .

And on my stove . . .

Creamy hot cocoa with some Bailey's, scrumptious pots of soups and stews.

Hunkering down under a blanket in front of a warm crackling fire . . .

Or TV . . .

Reading a book or watching a fantastic movie.

But I don’t want to muster up these feelings to “get through” till spring.

I want warm, sunny now.

And some humidity!

I’m so tired of sticking Vaseline up my nose because of bone dry air.

What’s that you say? Buy a humidifier?

I did.

Three of them.

I also hang wet towels around my bedroom so the air can absorb the moisture.

I swear! Grapes can turn into raisins in a day in this apartment!

Not to mention my skin!

So . . .

If I built a writers retreat in Cancun . . .

Or another village close by. . .

Would you come?

It would be a quaint bed & breakfast kind of place . . .

A writer’s sanctuary looking out to the crystal clear, turquoise waters of the Caribbean.

Or perhaps a villa hidden away amid lush tropical vegetation.

Peacocks and iguanas would leisurely roam.

Tasty, healthy meals would be provided. Local fare or whatever you like.

I’d work a sweet deal with Expedia from all major cities to Cancun so it’d be easy to get to.

With free transportation to and from the airport.

Also one free massage daily would be included.

WiFi? Of course.

A van and driver too if you wanted to tour Mayan ruins . . .

Or swim with the dolphins.

You'd have days of tranquil writing time . . .

For your W.I. P . . .

New novel . . . 

Short story, poems, or whatever.

Or perhaps to just read.

So . . .

If I build  . . .

A writers retreat  . . .

Would you come?

Yes?

OK then . . .

I'm going to start Googling properties for this writers retreat . . .

And I'll keep you posted.

Always, Em-Musing

P.S. I am serious.

AND THE WINNER IS?

Super Bowl  XLIV!

Of course I watched it . . .

And like many people . . .

I watched it just for the commercials.

But I probably watched the commercials for a different reason than most people because . . .

I used to write both TV and radio commercials.

And if can brag . . .

I’ve won many awards for my writing.

And if I can share . . .

I LOVE writing TV and radio spots.

I love the challenge of so little time to get the message across.

And writing humorous commercials is what I loved most.

But the bottom line with humorous or any commercial is . . .

While it’s great to entertain the audience . . .

And make them laugh  . . .

If at the end of :30 or :60 . . .

The audience can’t remember the name of the client or what the product or service is  . . .

Then the commercial was a loser and didn’t do it’s job.

So with that in mind, I watched.

Was it just me? Or was the theme during the first-half poking fun at wimpy men?

Didn't care much for the commercial with the close-up shot of men’s rear ends as they walked in their underpants.

Loved the commercial with the groundhog playing the violin.

And the one with the sumo wrestler made me laugh out loud.

The one with the woman in the bathtub who texed was also funny.

But to be honest?

I can’t tell you today what any of the products were or who the companies were for these.

So for me . . .

The winning TV commercial  last night was . . .

Google.

Yup, Google.

No, I didn’t laugh, wasn’t supposed to.

But the genius of this commercial was that the Google logo was on the screen the entire :30.

It showed exactly how Google is used.

And while showing how Google is used, the commercial told a story.

And my goodness, it couldn’t have cost much to produce either.

Just a static shot of a Google page.

With the FX of typed in searches.

And only one SFX at the end of a baby cooing.

There were no movie, TV or sport stars . . .

No extras . . .

No cars whizzing in the commercial . . .

No computer animation . . .

No music.

Not even a voiceover.

Just pure genius.

If a viewer hadn't known how Google is used before watching the commercial . . .

They surely would after :30.

And though the commercial wasn't knee slapping funny, it did make me smile.

The second commercial I liked was the montage of historical moments caught on TV.

Too bad I can’t remember who the company or what the product is. Some little TV is all I remember.

And of course there were honorable mentions . . .

Like the E*TRADE spot with the babies talking.

Coca Cola's with the man sleep-walking in Africa.
Dr. Pepper's with Kiss and mini-Kiss.
And the Denny's spot with the hens.
What I find so ironic in all of this though is . . .

While I love the challenge of writing “briefly” for commercials  . . .

Why in heaven’s name is writing briefly for a query  . . .

Such a painstaking process?

And why did it take me so long to write one?
(Dear God, I hope I finally have a winning one).

Always, Em-Musing
P.S. I must fess up. I didn't see all the commercials last night. I fell asleep soon after The Who performed.

So there could very well have been commercials just as effective as the Google spot and I just didn't see them.

Guess I'll just have to Google Super Bowl XLIV TV spots to see them.