PLEASE RELEASE ME, LET ME GO!

This post is part of the monthly blog hop/therapy session known as the Insecure Writers Support Group, founded by the one and only, Alex J. Cavanaugh. If you're a writer, insecure, or just supportive of writers—insecure or not—please join us. It happens the first Wednesday of each month. I encourage everyone to visit at least a dozen new blogs and leave a comment. Your words will be appreciated.

This month’s question? Did you ever say, “I quit”? 

If so, what happened to make you come back to writing?

Me?

Quit writing?

Never!

But I have quit a manuscript.

But not for long because

It was painfully annoying

And the guilt was killing me.

Manuscript: Hey Em! Why are you putting me away?

I don’t want to be put into a file.

Me: It won’t be for long.

Manuscript: I don’t want to be forgotten like all those poems you’ve written and haven’t looked at again.

Me: I just lost passion for them. Got insecure. I promise

I’ll bring you out again.

A few months went by

Manuscript: Hey Em! Remember me?

Me: Oh hi, manuscript.

Manuscript: See! You did forget about me. Didn’t you ever wonder how I was doing? Didn’t you care that I might have felt abandoned? Lonely?

Me: Well now that  you mention it, yeah I did wonder.

Manuscript: Then take me out. Give me life again.

And I did. 

Because the guilt I felt for abandoning my manuscript. . .

Wasn't worth it. 

And actually I am in the process of working on the query for the manuscript to send to agents. . .

Yet again! Lord help me!!

So?

What about you?

 Ever abandon a manuscript?

Did you feel guilty?

Always,

Em-Musing

AFTER LIGHT

Ya’ll have seen the original Poltergeist movie, right?

The part when the little lady encourages the spirits...

“Go to the light, children, go to the light!"
And I know you’ve heard stories...

About people who have had near death experiences…

Who saw an encouraging, radiant light...

And a strong desire to ‘ 'go to the light'.

Sounds amazing, and comforting, right?

Um, not so for me...

You see, I have a problem with light...

Certain kinds of light, that is...

Specifically white lights...

Like harsh white florescent bulbs...

That make you feel like you’re in a grungy workshop...

Where someone’s doing illegal stuff.

And harsh LED white Christmas lights—not merry!

And those bluish/white car headlights—blinding!

But the most annoying blazing whites lights...

Are those ugly curlicue piggytail lightbulbs

That are supposed to last forever, but don’t.

Who can live under that garish glow?

Needless to say...

I have a major hang-up with white lights...

And you might ask, what’s the big deal, right?

Well, it’s not such a big deal on earth…

Because I can avoid them as much as possible…

But what happens when say...

I…uh…leave this earthly plane...

And this happens:

Spirit: “Come to the light, Em!”

Me:     What kind of light is it?”

Spirit:  Does it matter?

Me:     Yes, actually it does...

Spirit:  Why?

Me:     If it’s too white, I don’t want to go.

Spirit:  I’ve never had anyone respond like this.

Me:     What can I say? I like candlelight, sunlight,

          moonlight, soft yellow light. But not white  
          light.

Spirit:   You must come now, there’s no place for you

          to wait while I check what kind of light it is.

Me:      You mean I have to go no matter what?

Spirit:   Well, there is an alternative...

Me:      Really? What is it?

Spirit:   You can go to the dark.

Me:      Umm, on second thought I’ll take my   
          chances and go to the light, whatever it turns 
          out to be.  
          

So?

Do you have light or lighting issues?

And do you believe in the After Light?

Always,

Em-Musing

HEAD RUSH

The other day for a blog hop...

The question was asked...

What is the weirdest research you’ve ever done?

And as a writer, I can attest that yes...

I have uncovered some weird, awful, and sometimes sad stuff.

Like this one time...

I was researching human trafficking of teens (so very sad)...

For a screenplay I was working on...

When WHOOP!

A porn site pops up on my screen...
Then more popped up, and more, and more!

Thinking a virus infected my computer...

I immediately shut it down.

I guess I’ve seen too many movies and TV shows...

Because the next thing I knew...
This scenario popped up in my head...

I'm back working at my computer...

When out of the blue...

A swat team breaks down my door...

Rushes in...

Grabs my computer...
Drags me away...

All the while telling me I’m the lowest crud on earth! 
I shook my head smiling, realizing I was overreacting.

I thought my overreacting days were over...

Until recently...  

I was doing research for my W.I.P....

And wanted to see if a particular setting in my story...

Has ever been the target of terrorist activity...

When out of nowhere this scenario pops up in my head...

This time, a government agency is monitoring me...

One day, as I'm working on my computer...
My door bursts open...

And some kind of special ops squad...

Rushes in my house...

Blindfolds me and drags me away!

The next thing I know...
I’m in some kind of room...

You know the kind...

Bare concrete walls and a metal table with two chairs...

I’m sitting in one chair...

My interrogator is in the other...

While other special guys watch...

From behind a mirror that’s really a window.

“Em,” the interrogator says...

We’ve been watching you...

And your history of Google searches is disturbing...
Porn, human trafficking, terrorsts.”

“But, but—I’m a writer...

All I was doing is research. That’s all! I swear!!”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s what they all say. Not buying it.”

“Do I at least get to make a phone call?” I whimper like a wussy baby.

“Not in this scenario. Take her away”

So?

Ever research something edgy?

Ever wonder if someone’s watching?

Ever have weird scenarios pop up in your head?

Always,

Em-Musing