Tuesday, September 24, 2013

GOT MONKEY?

They say we humans came from monkeys...
I don’t believe in evolution…
But if I did…
I’d say there’s one thing…
That monkeys do…
That I wish had evolved to be included with humans…
Grooming.
Every video clip I see of monkeys…
There’s always one monkey grooming another one.
I need that...
I need a monkey...
Who takes responsibility to groom me…
And tell me things like…
Pluck that long white hair growing out of your chin…
Or pluck that long black one growing out of your neck.
Or pick the spinach out of your teeth…
Or grab a tissue…
And get that moco hanging out of your nose…
And speaking of  your nose…
Get the scissors and clip the hairs out it.
(thank God I don’t have any hair growing out of my ears)
Or maybe I do!
And if I had a monkey it’d tell me that...
And a thousand other little details…
That require constant grooming.
And is it just me?
That the older I get…
The more I need more upkeep...
And that's why I need a monkey.
Hmm? Now that I think about it...
There are monkeys here in my jungle...
But on second thought, no...
I'd be afraid one day...
It'd go ninja on me and bite my face off.
So what about you?
Need a monkey?
Or...
Who's the monkey in your life?


Always, Em-Musing

7 comments:

Barbara Watson said...

Hhaaa! Those grooming monkey clips always make me a little queasy. I imagine all the disgusting bugs and things they're picking out, I guess.

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Not if he was a good Ninja monkey!

Michael Offutt, Phantom Reader said...

Evolution says that humans and monkeys shared a common ancestor. It does not say that we evolved from monkeys.

Gina Gao said...

This was really amusing! Grooming is extremely important.

www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

Green Monkey said...

Hey.... I thought this was all about me! :)

thanks for reminding me to pull out the magnifying glass. just because I don't see it doesn't mean others don't.

thanks for the smile!

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Evolution is bunk anyway!

Monkeys can be unpredictable, but they can also be trained.

dolorah said...

LOL; yep, I need a monkey to tell me my clothes are on backwards or inside out :)

Of course, my ex-hubby is good at alerting me to all my shortcomings when he is around.

.........dhole