NUTCRACKING HEARTACHE

Recently I had hip replacement surgery…

Oh the pain, the ache! 

But not in my hip…  

MY HEART!

Rewind ten years ago…

When I lived in the States…

And was full-time babysitter for my 3 grandkids…

To entertain them and myself…

I would bring over various CD's…

Then grab each one and whirl and twirl them ‘round and ‘round.

One of their favorites was Tchaikovsky's, The Nutcracker Suite…
Especially Waltz of the Flowers.

My oldest granddaughter eventually took ballet lessons…

And I always wondered…  

If all the whirling and twirling had an influence.

Throughout the years…

I went to many of her performances…  

And was proud, to say the least. She was good.

And then a few months ago I got a call…

“Grandma! I made it into The Nutcracker! 

Three parts! A flower, a snowflake, and an Arabian!”

“Oh my god, Sweetie, So happy for you. When?”

“November 18^th, 19^th & the 20^th. You’re coming, right?”

My heart sank to the lowest it’s ever been…

That was the weekend of my surgery…

Oh why couldn’t the performance be in December?

If you’ve ever had surgery…

You know it’s not like showing up for an oil change…

When they can take you right in…

And in my case if I cancelled my surgery…

I’d have to wait months for another slot.

“I’m sorry, Sweetie, I can’t come.”

** silence **

Eventually she understood…

My head did too…

But not my heart. Still ached.

My daughter called after the first performance…

“She did exceptionally well.”

“Did you take a video?” I asked.

“They didn’t allow it.”

The night before the last performance…

I called my granddaughter…  

“Sweetie, please can you take a picture…

Of you in your costumes…

So I can at least see how you look? Please!”

And she did.

My heart eased some…
And I made a vow to her…

That next year…

Come hell or high water…
Or surgery…

I’d be there to see her perform.

So?

Ever have any heart-aching circumstances?
Or have a "thing" yay or nay for The Nutcracker?

Always,

Em-Musing