Monday, June 14, 2010

CHEMICALLY INDUCED STUPIDITY

Warning to writers!
Do not write with chemicals…
Either in your head…
Or on your head!
Because…
You will turn into…
An idiot…
Like me…
I have an appointment later today…
And after getting startled by a skunk this morning…
(me in the mirror with an inch wide stripe of gray hair down my scalp)
I figured I’d better take the time to dye my hair.
So as not to look unprofessional.
(or like an idiot)
So, there I was…
Putting the last drop of dye on my hair…
When an idea for a chapter in my newest novel…
Popped into my mind.
Quickly, I washed my hands and ran to my laptop.
And oh, the words flowed…
My fingers flew over the keyboard…
I felt like a maestro…
Composing the most creative piece of work when…
Huh?
Why does my head feel hot?
The dye!
I looked at the clock.
OMG!
The dye had been processing on my head…
For an hour!
I sprinted to the bathroom…
Jumped in the shower…
I rinsed, I shampooed. I rinsed, I shampooed.
For ten minutes.
Then I slapped a handful of conditioner…
On my still warm head.
Tentatively, I stepped out of the shower.
Nervously I looked in the mirro–
AHHGG!
Pink hair!
And pink scalp!
Now what?
What do I say at this meeting this morning?
“Hi, please excuse my pink hair. I over processed it.”
And then smile like an idiot?
Or do I just shake their hands…
Say nothing…
And let them think what they want?
Hmm? Pink Hair? Pink scalp? She must be an idiot!
So to all writers…
I caution you…
So as not to look like an idiot 
Focus…
While under the influence…
Of chemicals.

Always, Em-Musing

No comments: